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The Real Magic

I have seen so many people drawn to a multitude of therapists and treatments and 2 cent psychologies that come and go. They are often seductive and have a magical quality that can appeal to that part of us that just want the answer to our self and life problems because it can be extremely painful and anxiety-provoking to hold out and see what happens. Sometimes, seductive therapists, healers, and treatments can shore up our narcissism by selling us the idea that we can belong to a special group of people, or that our more problematic areas of our personality are not problematic, flawed, or destructive but rather, are gifts, outcomes of rare talent, creativity or perceptual sensitivity. Other times, they appeal to our consumeristic aspirational fantasies as a way of placating our low self worth and dissatisfaction. The danger of seductive therapists, healers, and treatments is they encourage the idea that they have the solutions rather than staying alongside you, with your deepest uncertainties and lack of answers, long enough that you develop your own. This creates constant seeking which creates far too much dependency on other people's (and societal) thinking.


There is nothing wrong with wanting to improve yourself and your life circumstances. Being drawn to self knowledge can be enormously helpful to assist and support your own life and development, but I do not think that what is being offered should replace your own thinking and developmental pathway. The more you replace your own thinking with other people or groups, the more unsure you become of yourself, your own identity, and capacity to steer your own life. The real magic lies in your own thinking, and following through on it, along into your own life path. Good supports should support, expand, and strengthen the development of your own thinking and not seduce you into abandoning your own process. This may not sound as appealing as having the answers but it is real and, dare I say, magical.

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